I found myself teary this morning. I went in Emma's room to ask her a question. The was she was sleeping, I didn't see a 14 year old girl. I saw the little four year old Emma. I remember how her face used to light up when she'd see me, and she'd exclaim "Mommy!" and throw her arms around my neck, hugging me as tight as she could. I miss that time, when she loved me openly and purely, and didn't care who saw. I was her biggest confidant and first friend. Now she hardly tells me a thing, shares all her secrets with her friends, and doesn't often give hugs.
I know this is normal, and natural, and how it should be. I am proud of the young woman she is becoming, but I still mourn the little girl who was left behind.
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She may not act the way she used to, but trust that she does love you as much as she did before and always will. Once she's past this teenage phase and stops caring about who sees, she will progress towards relying on you as much as before, but in a different way.
ReplyDeleteyou've put it so perfectly- it is so bittersweet, isn't it? We groom them to be these wonderful people- but we miss our little girls :) YET...we would never want them to just stay our little girls...so we are proud they are growing up into wonderful women :) oh my- the conundrum!
ReplyDeleteAw!!! Now I'm all teary eyed!!! Connor's gonna leave me one day! :)
ReplyDeleteThe relationship will come back around when she's older and it will get much deeper and unconditional. I have that with my mother now.
Enjoy each stage. I know that is hard to understand at times. But your little girl is still there.
ReplyDeleteThank you all for such lovely comments. I am blessed in that we do have a good relationship, and I have enjoyed every age of her life. But occasionally the memories of those times sneaks up on me :)
ReplyDeleteLuckily Sophie has begun that stage, so I still get the hugs and kisses, but the first is always special.
I have those moments more and more. It seems like just yesterday I was introducing my oldest two to their baby sister. They were almost 5 and just turned 3. Now the oldest is in middle school and the other two are racing to catch up. :-( But, like you, I'm so proud of the young ladies they are becoming. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteI miss my little girl, too, but I have a dear friend in my daughter now as she grows older. I will always be her mom but the relationship we have now is so sweet. Wouldn't change it for anything.
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is only two and I love her hugs, kisses and mamamamama! I don't want to think of her not wanting to cuddle, hugs or share anything with me because I will cry. I'm glad you get to experience that more with Sophie. Every moment we have with them must be cherished
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