Thursday, March 24, 2011

I'm over the MamaDrama

The day I found out I was pregnant with S, I was doing some Googling and found a great website for pregnant families (yes, families. E was very involved with this pregnancy. It was her baby sister growing in there, after all!). BabyCenter can be an excellent resource - each week I received an email with the development of the baby, a drawing of what was going on in there, with explanations of how things were growing and changing. Each Sunday, E and I would cuddle up on the couch and see how her little sister was coming along. I know it taught her more about human biology than any schoolbook ever could.

The site also has many message boards - "birth clubs" (members all have babies born/due in the same month), parents of all ages of kids, and every interest o family situation under the sun. They are also an excellent window into the Mommy Wars.

Seriously - these ladies get so worked up over things! The recent news about recommendations to keep babies rear-facing in car seats longer? Has been a hot topic for several months now. And heaven forbid someone gets excited and posts a cute picture of their child facing forward (legally!) - she gets bashed for pages and called a horrible mother. Feed your baby formula? Use disposable diapers? Oh, the horror! And don't even bring up vaccinations.

I am so over the drama! As long as your children are happy, healthy, and well-cared-for, who cares how you go about it? Do these mothers really think that when they march their little angels to school for the first day of kindergarten the teachers will ask where they slept as infants, if they breastfed or drank formula, if they used cloth diapers or not? No. One. Cares. It's just another way for some to feel superior.  Message signature lines are filled with all kinds of acronyms stating parenting styles. It gets a bit ridiculous sometimes.

Some arguments I CAN get behind (although I stay far away from the drama, just agree in my own head). I do think  Baby Bjorns and similar carriers are evil and should be burned. Multiple studies have shown how bad they are for infants' developing hips and spine. And can you imagine how uncomfortable they must be for the poor babies? But I go on my way, letting S ride along comfortably in our preferred carrier if she isn't walking or riding in the shopping cart (without the snazzy expensive cover).

If you want to know how I feel about diapering, vaccinating, "crying it out" at bedtime, or a multitude of other issues, go ahead and ask! I'll gladly share what works for us. But I won't preach to you. What works wonderfully for our family may be a disaster for yours.


  1. Way to go Christine! I am with you. There is no room for mama drama in my life either. Seriously, we're all trying to do our best right? Mommy wars - ugh. Another reason wine was invented!

  2. I totally agree! Actually, there is now a growing group of women who have banded together to try to eliminate bullying other moms via blogs! Check out: :)